Many of my friends had long stopped sending anything to my email. Not even birthday greetings. Emmy would frown and complain the email would be too full and we would lose it. Whatever that meant.
A little back story. I met Emmy at a fund-raising event where he was a special guest and I was an usher. He was a young, handsome guy representing his uncle, a commissioner, at the event. As perhaps the most beautiful of the ushers, I hate to brag, I was stationed at the high table and had the job of leading the dignitaries to their seats.
Emmy fixed his eyes on me at once. Several times, he called me for one silly thing or the other. He changed his drinks a couple of times, sent me with a note to one person or the other.
In the middle of the event, he requested for my number, and said he wasn’t making any donation till he got it. My relationship with him took on a roller-coaster afterward.
I thought he was the funniest guy on earth. He did many little things for me, and was so proud of taking me anywhere he went. I was a struggling student in the university up until I met Emmy. He worked as his uncle’s personal assistant, and usually made a lot of side-bucks, which he gladly shared with me.
I never saw his insecurities. He hid them so well. Yes, I know there were signs here and there. He once passworded my phone and I couldn’t use it for a couple of days. I never could understand why he did that. I was a naturally open person, and didn’t have any care in the world, but then Emmy would suggest I hid information about us from my family and friends.
Long story short, gradually, I became hooked on him. He complained he wanted to be with me all the time. He was so hung up on me, his uncle fired him from being PA and got him a more regular job.
I could see he gave a lot up for me. It meant nothing at first. Until I started having to give up stuff for him too. Hanging out with my friends competed with him. My family competed with him, my Instagram and whatsapp competed with him.
Oh wow, he left Facebook so we could use my account jointly and stopped using his yahoo email.
These all seemed so romantic. Except now he throws mad tantrums whenever I do things he didn’t like. Like forgetting to log off anytime I leave Facebook or the email, even if it’s ten times a day. He hates cold food too, and watching TV.
I had many male friends at the beginning of our 2-year relationship but now only Rosie hangs around sometimes, and she’s been asking me to move on. But how can I? I’m programmed to marry Emmy in a few weeks’ time!
I call this #baboon – insecurity spill. He’s coming. He will arrive one day, and you’ll be all alone. If he hasn’t chased your family yet, he eventually will. And he may never approve of you getting a job when if he lets you finish school. Oh, but what can you do? You want to marry him.
All the best in your love.